The first pillar to building trust is clarity.
Three things are vital for clarity according to Horsager: vision and purpose; expectations and communication; and daily tasks.
Vision and purpose: What is your vision for yourself as an educator? What is your vision for your students? How many of us even consider that? I know I didn’t for a long while. But things changed over time. Candidly: my vison for myself as an educator? This is part of my ‘why’ (see Simon Sinek’s TED Talk for more on this) - I strive to be the teacher who helps students discover their elements and then helps them develop the skills to be remarkable, life long learners. That’s why I exist.
Expectations/communications: Now here is where I can use a lot of improvement. I don’t think I do this well enough nor often enough. I tell stories, and stories are a great way to communicate expectations to students. I just need to be far more diligent about this.
A key tip from the author: If you’re specific with your requests about what you want (in other words, your expectations), you will almost always receive what you asked for.
Finally, daily tasks. Again, I need more work here. What tasks do I structure for my students to help them on their paths to discover their elements and then skills that will make them remarkable? This is where the real work is done. To be fair, this is probably where I spend most of my time when it comes to lesson planning and deliberate practice.
A key tip from the author: In helping you move the ball down the field with daily tasks (so to speak) these three things are good to keep in mind -
- What tasks or projects do we have that fall outside our mission or core beliefs? (Personally, this is why I avoid all busy work. For others this might include home work. Still others might put testing in here).
- What activities are holding us back from greater success? (Personally, this is one I model with my students all the time. If I have to get some reading done - and I read the books right along with my classes - I set a goal for what I need to get done (say read 50 pages this block). Then I state what I need to do in order to reach this goal (put away my phone and don’t look at it even once. Take my classroom phone off the hook. Close my laptop and find a comfortable stop in my room). Finally, when the block is up, I reflect on what I accomplished or analyze why I didn’t reach my goal. (Personally, I read 60 pages because I didn’t feel the need to check Twitter or my email every ten minutes. Since I wasn’t at my desk, I wasn’t tempted to grade papers or look at my laptop to check emails. Thus, I was able to get more done).
- Ask yourself this: Am I doing any “good” things that are keeping me from doing the “best” things? In other words, good is the enemy of great. I often share with students my quest to get in shape and lose weight. By asking myself this question, I know I’m doing good things by getting up early and exercising, but I’m also doing some things that are getting in my way - not eating right and not avoiding enough carbs. The latter is getting in my way of being the best that I can be.
There is one vital thing to note here when it comes to clarity. It’s fine to note that “This might not be for you” when it comes to some students in your class. I used to beat myself up trying to get kids to buy in to what I was selling them about their elements and developing their skills. But some just don’t buy it. That’s okay. That is why if I’m clear on anything, one of the first messages out of my mouth on the first day of class is this: if you aren’t here to discover what lights you up and to develop a variety of writing skills that will help you with your passions and certainly in college, then this class isn’t for you. You’re welcome to stay, but it’s going to be an uphill battle for you. It’s okay to realize that. It saves you a lot of misery. Just make that clear to your students and yourself.
One final tip - have a mission statement. It will help guide you and help your clarity. This is why I kicked this whole thing off talking about one’s Noble Teaching Purpose. I exist to help students discover what they are good at and then develop skills around that to set them on a path for work they will one day love. Whenever I see a standard or an assignment, that mission statement is so ingrained in me, that it always cross references itself against that.
The second pillar to trust is compassion.
This might be the most essential component for building trust. When I think of compassion, especially when it comes to my classroom and the students in it, I think of it as simply caring. In other words, when students walk in, are you happy that they’re there? Do they know it? How do you show it to them?
In fact, at LHS, we have a core value built around compassion: “It’s Not About Us.” Hosager has a great quote in this section of the book that reminds me of our core value: “Show that you think beyond yourself; you will be distinctive and successful in your industry.”
Being part of a class should be more than just a routine. Maybe I’m odd when it comes to this, but being part of a class should be an experience. I’m not going to lie, when you sign up for College Comp I, II or even English 9R, you’re in for an experience. And part of that experience is that I care.
If you look around, compassion is what fuels any successful entity. Why do I love apple products so much, in spite of the fact that they often infuriate me with their constant upgrades and changes (I still remember when they went to iMovie 3.0. I had the first two versions down cold, but then when they came out with iMovie 3.0, it was like I was using Final Cut Pro or something. It was way too complex). Or how every time they come out with a new iPhone or MacBook Air, all the ports are different and now I have to buy new cables and accessories! Yet, why do I stick by them? Because they show in their amazing customer service how much they care.
One time I spilled coffee all over my old MacBook laptop. It was fried. I called applecare and they ran the specs. Turns out they were going to clean it all up for me and even throw in an extra large hard drive because (unbeknownst to me) there was a problem with my specific type of hard drive and they had extended the warranty on it. That compassion build loyalty in me, and I’ll never own another phone or computer because of that.
When it comes to building compassion, Horsager uses an acronym (and we all know how teachers love those) - The four L.A.W.S. of compassion
L - Listen. Part of helping others is just listening to them. This is one of my favorite things to do when students come in early. I just talk with them. And sometimes the most trivial stuff they share is some of the best stuff when it comes to showing compassion. A student may mention a rough moment at their job. Then at the end of the week as they leave class, I’ll pull them aside and ask them how their job is going. I’ll just listen. That’s all they really want. I don’t have to help them solve it. They just need to know I care.
A - Appreciate. Who doesn’t like to be appreciated? I’m convinced there can never be enough of this in any environment. I mean when was the last time you ever heard someone say that they are tired of their teacher, boss, manager, coach appreciating them so much? Never! In fact, author and consultant Patrick Lencioni knows multi-millionaire athletes who are completely miserable (despite the outrageous money they are paid) simply because they feel like their coach doesn’t really appreciate them enough!
W - Wake up. I’m terrible at this. Not at school but at home. Just yesterday I came home from summer school and was so focused on the future (getting the house clean so we can enjoy supper in a clean house) that I wasn’t even listening to Kenzie tell me about how her day went. She was talking and I was only half listening as I swept up and walked right by her on my way to the pantry to grab the dustpan and then the Swiffer! Thankfully, Kenzie called me out on it. Then I woke up and gave her the five minutes of attention she needed. After that, I went back to cleaning. How often in classes do we really focus on what students are telling us? Or do we just focus on listening for what we want to hear (the “right” answer)?
S - Serve others. Here we go. We are back to our core value of “It’s Not About Us” again. How do we serve our students? They aren’t here for us! We exist to serve them. Yet, how often do we stop and really think (and act) that way? I’m reminded of my favorite plumber/furnace repair man. Two years ago we came home from my mother in law’s early because Cody was going to propose to KoKo on Christmas Eve. His sister was going to use Facebook Live so we could watch. But the minute I walked in the door of our house, I knew something was wrong. The temperature was at 58 degrees. Our furnace was out! That meant I had to call Todd to come check on it. He answered on the third ring and said he’d be right over. On Christmas Eve! Fifteen minutes later, the furnace was up and running and Todd was headed back home. Talk about service! I knew I had to go with Todd on my new furnace because years before he was my neighbor. Every time it snowed, when Todd got home from work, he’d fire up his skid-steer, hook up his monster snowblower, and blow out every yard in our neighborhood. He didn’t ask anything in return. He just served his neighbors. Well, when it came time to buy a new furnace, I knew who we were going to go with. If Todd took such good care of me when I was just his neighbor, I had no worries about how he’d take care of me as a customer. Service is everything!
The third pillar essential for trust is character.
For much of my life, this has been one of my favorite words when it comes to how others describe me, as in oh that Reynolds, he’s quite the character.
But that isn’t what Horsager has in mind with the third pillar that is essential for developing trust. For this type of ‘character’ Horsager means character as in ‘integrity’ and ‘morality.’ Two things that go way beyond my initial definition of character.
Essentially, Horshag notes that there are two sides to character. The first part of integrity simply means consistency. Do you say what you mean and mean what you say? Do you talk the talk AND walk the walk? If you do this, you have a huge leg up when it comes to developing trust. Who doesn’t trust (and then follow) someone who they know will come through when they need it? In our profession, if you know a student is willing to come to you with a problem or seek you out for a reference or letter of recommendation, you know they trust you. They know you will come through for them.
The second part of integrity is having high morals. Do you do the right thing? Early in my career, I wanted no part of this part of trust. The person I was in school was not the person I was outside of school. But that has changed drastically as I’ve grown as a person. If people know you and know that you are morally sound, they will put their faith and trust in you far more often than if they don’t.
When I try to impress this upon my students, the one thing I tell them is that what really matters most is what you do when no one is looking. In my experience, that is a true test of character.
And it matters. I’ll give you a real life example. Two years ago, the Writer’s Club used to meet in my room after school. They were meeting while I was out working on the yearbook. By the time I got back, they were all long gone, but I found a note on my desk. It was from a student that I had never had in class before. In the note, he explained that he had stopped by to visit a friend who was in Writer’s Club. In the course of his visit, he had been fooling around with one of the bouncy balls for my ball chairs. In fooling around, he lost control of it and it bounced off my wall, knocking down some Legos (Hagrid’s hut to be exact). He explained that he tried to put it back together as best he could, but he didn’t quite get it all put together. He apologized and left his number.
I was dumbfounded. I never expected that from a sophomore! I don’t know if I’d have had the guts (or character) to do that when I was his age. In fact, I know I wouldn’t have. I’d have left and hoped no one else ratted me out. This student could have slunk out, and I would have just thought it had fallen on its own, that my son had done it, or maybe a cleaner knocked it over. But he did the right thing and took responsibility . . . even when it would have been easier not to.
I knew from that moment on, I could trust this young man and I looked forward to having him in class. In fact, I am going to write about how much I thought of his character then and there in his senior letter next year. That’s the power of doing the right thing even if no one is watching.
As Horsager notes, someone is always looking (even if it’s just you). The one person who is always there, of course, is you (or your conscience). Think about that the next time your character is tested!
Finally, Horsager gives us five ways that allow us to demonstrate our character to others:
Humility
Principles
Intention
Self-discipline
Accountability
In what ways can we model these in our own classes in front of our students?
The fourth pillar to trust, and maybe the most vital key, is competency.
How can anyone trust you if you aren’t competent? But how does one become competent?
Well, for teachers, that’s where our undergraduate degree comes in, but, speaking from experience, that gives us just a very, very superficial level of competence. Outside of my methods classes and a reading class, I wasn’t given much in the way of tools in my competency belt. My Measurement and Evaluation class? A joke. My Ed Psych class? Interesting and informative but nothing relevant. My Classroom Discipline class? A joke as well.
So if our undergraduate degrees just give us a superficial base for competency, how do we build upon that?
First, there is relying on your team members. I learned a ton from Lisa, Loiell, and Jan my first year. Though the names have mostly changed over the past two decades, that is still true. Rely on your team members to help improve you and push you.
Second - and I love this one - read to learn. Horshager writes, “Mrs. Klein, my daughter’s kindergarten teacher, wisely said, ‘Reading is critical because in the first three years of school, one learns to read. After that, one reads to learn.’” This is so true for helping me build my competency as a composition teacher.
Third - and this doesn’t come from Horshager - podcasts. These are gold. They do so much for inspiring and challenging me. Whatever your field or interest, there is a podcast for you.
Yesterday, I just discovered this podcast, Better Leaders, Better Schools: Relentless Learning with Hamish Brewer. This is an absolute gold mine. If I was still working as an adjunct at UND, this would be mandatory listening for my Teaching and Learning 250 students.
And that is just the tip of the iceberg for what podcasts can offer us.
The fifth pillar necessary for trust is commitment.
Speaking from experience here, I can tell you this one is vital. When I think of commitment I think of some legends around LHS: Reese, H, Kahlhammer, and Mumm (to name just a few).
I’ve been on choir trips with Reese and have seen first hand her commitment. When she is up at 6 am ready for a whale watching trip after staying out until 1:00 am the night before . . . enough said. That’s commitment.
I’ve been mentored long enough by H (and have worked with his students long enough) to know that his commitment speaks for itself. When I first started teaching at LHS, H was known to show up on Saturday mornings to work with his students who had missed class during the week. When I asked a former student, Keaton Joppru (who is now finishing medical school) about H, he noted how H went out of his way to meet with Keaton and re-teach him college chemistry. That’s commitment.
I worked down the hall and passed her room enough to know that Erika Kahlhammer lived and breathed her science class. I talked with a former student who said that Erika constantly went above and beyond to help her out once she knew she had a passion for eyes and becoming an optometrist one day. That’s commitment.
Finally, I’ve coached and taught with my dear friend, Coach Mumm long enough to know that his commitment to LHS and his students and athletes is second to none. Who goes out of their way to bring his class Dilly Bars? Coach Mumm. Who meets with his captains once per week and is in constant contact with former athletes of his? Coach Mumm. Who tries to note everything that goes on at LHS and brag it up on social media? Coach Mumm. In fact, Coach Mumm IS commitment. Period.
On the opposite end of commitment is . . . what? Apathy? Half-assing? Selfishness? I don’t know, but it doesn’t inspire anyone. And students can see right through this.
That is one reason I try to write as many of the papers right along with my students. That way when my third block College Comp class saunters in complaining about having a five page literary analysis due on Friday, I can say, “Stuff it. I wrote my rough draft over my lunch break!” They know I’m committed because I’m doing the work with them (and showing them the mistakes I made and how I overcame them as a way to try and help them in the writing process too).
The sixth pillar of trust is connection.
Horsager leads off with a quote from Maya Angelou that illustrates connection very well: “I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.” For teaching, this is even more true.
Trust is all about relationships. How do you establish and strengthen relationships? Connection.
If you have ever studied the business Dutch Bros. Coffee, you know the importance of connection. Just take a look at their core values and mission statement.
Here is a picture from one of their stores that went viral that also illustrates the power of connection.
You don’t get connection like that unless leadership all the way down encourages it. Think that later will be a customer for life? Who cares? The real point is that she will remember this moment and how much those workers cared in that moment. That is what is really important.
How is this different than what we do with kids every day? It isn’t. If you aren’t striving for connections, you’re missing the boat. Worse yet, you aren’t building the relationships with kdis that you should be.
The seventh and eighth pillars of trust are contribution and consistency.
This reminds me of a quote from Zig Ziglar that I’ve tried to live by these last 22 years: “If you help others get what they want, sooner or later you’ll get everything you want.” That covers the contribution part. In other words, don’t just think of this in terms of what you bring to the table, but what can you do to help others achieve.
In terms of consistency, this relates to one our core values at LHS: “Excellence in the ordinary.” Mr. Zutz explained what this was so important. If you can do the little things with excellence, then the big things will fall in place too. It’s hard to have people take you seriously when you did some of the big things well but you are terrible at the little things. That’s the importance of being consistent.
No comments:
Post a Comment