Educating Esme

I'm just about done with this book.  It will be one of the texts my Intro to Education class at UND will be reading this fall.

I've heard of it, but I've never had the chance to read it yet.

It is the journal of a first year teacher.  Even though my first year was 16 years ago, I recall much of Esme's frustration.  However, I didn't have Esme's creative or drive.

Back then I looked forward to Friday A LOT.  And I dreaded Monday A LOT.

My problem was that I got the classes that no one wanted.  I got the left over Comm 10 classes.  This was both a blessing and a curse.  It was great for me to teach the same class five out of six periods.  I was able to hone my chops that way.  However, what I struggled most with was controlling the kids.

I recall spending many nights just wringing my hands wishing that I coached some of the boys that way I could threaten to sit them if they didn't behave.  I wish I could reason with their parents to have them beaten or disciplines.

What I was missing - and this didn't dawn on me until after Christmas break - was that no teacher - regardless of how mean or passionate or interesting - can control a class.  Unless you have a weapon or psychological control over someone - no one person can make another do something they don't want to do.  Period.

Once I realized that - that my students had to be quiet and working hard all the time - the easier life became for me.  I relaxed and decided the only thing I could really control was me and how I taught.  This led to more engaging and interesting lessons.  This led me to building relationships with more students.

That first year was still a disaster, but it was necessary for me to improve.

I just wish I would have had Esme's creativity and passion.  I stuck to the text book too much and bored  the kids to death - no wonder the rebelled!

I like this passage form the book

"All these people [teachers] conspiring to make children's days as boring and meaningless as possible.  All the meeting are variations on one theme: How an we all be the same and get the children to do likewise? On any given agenda: lines and keeping children in them, the proliferation of talking and how to stop it, textbooks and state goals, are all the children learning what everyone else is learning?"

Sometimes I wonder if all that much has really changed.

Another passage that I love (this comes after Esme has her first dreaded "curriculum mapping session")

"The closed-door teacher anarchy I suggested seems so scary in theory, but in reality, I see it already exists. In my opinion, prefabricated curriculum and board mandates that are concocted to hide this state of affairs can work two ways. They can be benign suggestions that make talented inventors out of teachers. Or they can make it so people who don't have anything to share can still work, since their scripts are made up for them. Nobody really knows which is happening when the teacher closes the door. At worst, mediocrity. At best, miracles."

This year we are looking to delve into common assessment in our English department.  While many may view this as a move toward what Esme is railing against above, I don't see it that way.  I have no problem with the idea that my students should be at a specific spot after 18 weeks in my class.  They should have read so many books and written so many pieces and mastered so many skills.  I like that idea.  I like knowing that I can measure my kids using the same measurements as my colleagues.

What I know will be essential to this will be also giving teachers the freedom to do what they do best in the ways they do it best.  That means if we decide to all teach To Kill a Mockingbird and then have all students take the same test at the end, then let us be free to teach TKM in our own unique ways.  I teach - naturally as we all do - in ways that play to my strengths.  My colleagues do the same.  I see no reason to ruin that with completely standardized curriculum.  In fact, that I think would lead to the same type of mediocre teaching Esme journals about in the above passage.