Accidents

Last week there was a fatal car accident just south of town. A former student here was killed. The father of a current student was seriously injured in the accident, though his injuries are non-life threatening.

Today I learned that another student here was seriously hurt in another accident on the same road when he collided with the rear end of a slow moving semi.

I believe this is the fifth fatal accident of either current or former students in the last six years.

*****

Since a majority of my class is gone for mass choir rehearsal, I decided to jump the gun on a holiday tradition in my class and put in National Lampoons Christmas Vacation. I admit, A Christmas Story, How the Grinch Stole Christmas, A Miracle on 42nd Street, A Christmas Carol, and even the new The Polar Express are classics, but - in my book - there is no finer holiday film than Christmas Vacation. I nearly wet myself every time I see that scene with the squirrel.

The kids go nuts over this.

I didn’t plan on showing it quite yet. I planned to go into Ch. 18 of TKM in depth today. It’s the peak of the trial. Yet, I don’t want to go over it with a fraction of my class here. So I jumped the gun on the film by a week and a half.

Last week when I was home sick, I had good intentions of getting some Christmas reading done, namely Dickens’ “A Christmas Carol,” Capote’s “A Christmas Memory,” Steffens’ “A Miserable Merry Christmas,” and Capps’ “The Night Old Santa Claus Came.” However, I only finished the Capote piece, which a story about a young boy and his odd distant relative, who is in her seventies. Together they make fruitcakes each Christmas for various people. What a delight it was. His style is absolutely intoxicating.

Check out these slices --

Setting the scene for the story -- “Other people inhabit the house, relatives; and though they have power over us, and frequently make us cry, we are not, on the whole too much aware of them. We are each other’s best friend. She calls me Buddy, in memory of a boy who was formerly her best friend. They other Buddy died in the 1880’s, when she was still a child. She is still a child.”

Describing shelling pecans for the fruitcakes -- “Caarackle! A cheery crunch, scraps of miniature thunder sound as the shells collapse and the golden mound of sweet oily ivory meant mounts in the milk-glass bowl.”

After drinking the remnants of the whiskey they had left over from the fruitcakes --“My dancing shadow rollicks on the walls: our voices rock the chinaware; we giggle: as if unseen hands were tickling us.”

Then the wrath of other inhabitants of the house catching them drunk -- “Enter: two relatives. Very angry. Potent with eyes that scold, tongues that scald.”

****

As the students watch the film, I try to get caught up on my papers. Now here is a great way to start a Monday morning - here is the introductory paragraph to a persuasive essay on why burping shouldn’t be so shunned in our society today --

“You are in church, squished tightly between your mom and your grandmother. There are rows and rows of dutiful patrons parying with bowed heads. An occastional cough or sniffle distrupts the silence. You feel it coming and unsuccefully try to swallow it back down. Not now, not now you think. You shift uncomfortably in the pew. A burp, boisterous and loud erupts from your mouth. With it, the faint odor of Froot Loops, your breakfast. Elderly women gasp and cover their mouths, and you hear the shuffle of a hundred people turning to look at you. As their eyes bore into you with disgust, you look down into your lap, wishing you could melt into the pew.”

*****

When this year began, I saw that I would be having second hour prep for the entire year. I don’t know that I’ve had the same prep for the entire year since my first year. Initially, I thought it wasn’t going to go very well. I always enjoyed altering my prep hour from quarter to quarter. But what I forgot was how it helps me settel into a routine. Usually, I have no problem preparing for my first hour class, junior English. However, senior English, my third hour class, take much more preparation. So having my prep block prior to that has been great. It gives me just enough time to digest what happened first block, prepare for third block, and then work on anything else. After senior English I get a quick break (30 minutes for lunch) and then it’s on to my final class, Collge comp. That is a breeze. It’s almost like the class runs itself. So really when I get my seniors rolling third block, it is like my day is already done. I always try to sit back and observe the classes, yet somehow I always manage to get myself caught up in them. That’s not a bad thing. I end up learning right along with them.

*****

Last Friday I was reading my way through my College Comp persuasive essays. Oh yeah, you already read an introduction to one that I was reading this morning. Well, on Friday I came across one that got me fired up. And not in a good way either. We had discussed how students could argue any topic they wanted (I mean the Flat Earth Society in England argues that the world is flat - and those damn people for “We Never Landed on the Moon” almost had me believing after one of their TV speicals) - as long as they were logical and supported their arguments.

The essays were going quite well. Until I read one by a student who argued against the use of seat belts. I have no problem with this. I wear a seat belt, but I do it more to avoid the fine than anything else. However, her argument was so preposterous and ludicrous that I had to keep myself from snickering, but I’m sure my mouth still dangled open at some of the conclusions she drew.

First she tried arguing that seat belts really don’t save lives. I have no problem with this - had she found some real sources or evidence to back it up. Her evidence? She referred to a family friend who was decapitated - from her seat belt apparently - in an accident! Now what made her an expert at deducing causes of death in traffic accidents is beyond me, but apparently she assumed this would be enough to convince an audience that seat belts are dangers.

Next she charged that many accidents result in explosions or fires or being trapped in water. Again, I have no problem with this. But where is the evidence. Had she referred to a magazine article, a website, or even talked to a credible source (an EMT, a police officer, a fireman), I’d have been fine with it. But her entire argument for this was based on conjecture. She also tried to claim that it is better to be thrown clear from a car when it is rolling than it is to be trapped inside the rolling vehicle via your seat belt, where you would eventually be crushed. I guess it never dawned on her that you could be ejected from the car AND THEN THE CAR COULD ROLL ON TOP OF YOU AND CRUSH YOU or that you could die from the trauma caused by ejection. Her example for this was classic. Apparently she read or saw a story about a truck driver who was able to leap from his semi as it barrelled off a bridge. Luckily for him, he was just able to catch the handrailing and hang there as the semi went over the edge. She has seen too many Stallone or Schwarnzenger films. It’s hard to imagine my dad having leaped from his semi - even at 15 miles an hour - let alone the speed limit and survive.

I told her that her arguments needed some actual support. As it stood her claims were just too easy to dismiss. She would have been better off arguing the whole freedom issue like motorcyclists do with helmets.

What I honestly think happened was that her parents had fed her this line of thinking for years, so she just assumed it was gospel and put it into her paper. Well, she found it littered with holes in her thinking. Again, had she offered evidence (and there has to evidence out there that discredits the usefullness of safety belts) other than what she did. Oh yeah, another one was “the air bag is all you need.” Yet, one of my colleagues, whose husband is a firefighter, mentioned how her husband said that if you are not wearing your seat belt, the force of an airbag can kill you!

Is it wrong of me to take a guilty pleasure in challenging the thinking students have handed down to them from their parents? Isn’t that the purpose of education? To question and change your mind? She doesn’t have to believe what I questioned about her paper, but she can’t question that I shot some very large holes in her argument. Well, maybe it made me the subject of a dinner conversation over the weekend at least!

*****

Another highlight of the morning. I was grading some Dorian Gray creative projects. One student chose to take a quote from the story and create a collage based on that quote. The quote they chose was “Everything popular is wrong.” Now how appropriate is that for our culture today? Sure enough, the picture that dominates the collage is Britney Spears, with her newly shaved head, her mouth open and eyes raging, obvioulsy disgrunteld with the papparrazi. That picture says about 100,000 words.