Monday

I’m going to pay the price this week for not bringing anything - and I mean anything - home for work over the Thanksgiving break. Of course, that might explain why Kristie and I were so bored at times. But it was a break and I needed some rest and relaxation.

Kristie’s father, Ed, his wife, Laurie, and her uncle, Donnie came over. We had a blast. Kristie didn’t get home until 5:30, so I had to entertain them. It was no problem at all. Donnie is a near genius, so we decided to play Casey’s “American History Trivia.” Donnie slaughtered us. If I ever make it to “Who Wants to Be a Millionaire,” he is going to be one of my life lines.

Later two of Casey’s friends came over. Then Kristie made it home. We had a packed house. I made lasagna and fed everyone. While I was making it, we decided to play Monopoly. We had the choice between Star Wars Monopoly and Modern Day Monopoly (it’s an updated version. I think lowest bill is a thousand the the highest is five million). The last time Ed was over we played Monopoly too (which is a minor miracle, Kristie says, because when they were young he hated playing games - most likely because Kristie and her siblings are uber-competitive. There’ a reason her bog is titled “alphafemale.”) Last year, I had the misfortune of never landing on any property I made two full trips around the board (collecting two million every time I passed go - now that I think about it, I landed on free parking, so I collected about 15 million from the kitty) and never landed on any property. By the time I finally landed on property, everything else was taken! I went from the richest player to the poorest in a matter of half a dozen shakes of the dice. I was out before an hour passed.

Since I had to check on the meal periodically, I let Casey’s friend play for me. I have to admit I had a hidden agenda here: watching the LSU vs. Arkansas game (an SEC classic that was only decided after 4 OTs. The Razorbacks came out on top 50-48.)

After dinner and plenty of visiting, I was able to redeem myself some when we finished the night with Trivial Pursuit (the DVD version of the game). My formerly useless knowledge of ‘80s heavy metal came in quite handy. Not only did I nail the cover of Iron Maiden’s 1980 classic “The Number of the Beast,” but I also won the game by knowing that Vince Neil, singer of Motley Crue, drove drunk and killed the drummer of Hanoi Rocks. I was quite pleased with myself. It was not quite the same as Donnie’s impressive knowledge - which is the largest river in North America, which is the largest of the Florida Islands, all of the presidents who died serving terms, what Vermont’s nickname is, and the entire cabinet for Jimmy Carter! But I’ll take a win when I can get it. By the way, on Saturday Kristie absolutely slaughtered me it two games of Scrabble.




I did a ‘no-no’ in the teaching ranks. I assigned homework (that’s not the no-no). I also gave those who completed the homework an extrinsic reward (that’s the no-no): they were exempt from today’s quiz. Plus, I told each student that they earned 100 heart points (I stole this idea from a former science teacher who used to give these out. I don’t know that they count toward anything - mine don’t. But it sounds nice anyway). I even had one student read up to Ch 10 in TKM. I told him that he earned himself a permanent spot in my Cool Book.

About 1/3 of the class had the homework assignment done. I really was expecting less than that. Overall, they seem to be enjoying TKM. I certainly am - even if it’s the 75th time I’ve read it.

In fact, I’m convinced all of my life is relatable to the novel. This is the first time I’ve read the novel with Dad gone. His spirit lives in the southern traditions and antics of the characters. When I read about Scout always knowing how to read, I am reminded of how Kristie’s aunt, an elementary school teacher and principal, had Kristie reading well before school. In fact, she had Kristie reading the first grade textbook before she was even in first grade. When Kristie got to first grade, and the teacher handed the book out to the class, Kristie raised her hand and declared, “I’ve already read this.” Ha. Could you imagine?

When I read about mean old Burress Ewell, I am reminded of my own real life version of him in my senior English class. Like the Ewells of Maycomb, I have a separate set of rules of my real life Burress. If he sleeps in class, I don’t wake him. If he comes late, I don’t hassle him. If he needs to leave for an errand, I let him. Most of my students aren’t allowed these luxuries. Because I can do something with them. Or rather, they want to learn and take something away from this class. My Burress is just biding him time. I am too.

My copy of TKM is in tatters. But I would never part with it. It’s one novel that I wouldn’t loan out. I have to many memories scribbled in the margins. One day its molecules will just cease to retain the properties of a solid and simply disintegrate, but until then, I don’t let that baby out of sight.

One dilemma I briefly had with the text was its use of “N” word. I don’t make a big deal out of it - although I do not read the word aloud when reading from the book to the class. I hate that word and won’t give it any time. The same is true with other bad words in the stories or novels we read. If there is an “F” word (as is the case with “The Things They Carried”), I don’t read it aloud.

This time, though, I have an African American student in class. I thought about asking him about the word, but then if he said he had a problem with it, what was I going to do? Not read the book? That’s not an option. Go through every copy and white it out (how’s that for irony?) - no way. Then I began to think that maybe my bringing up the word to this student was even empowering it. The truth is I don’t think of him as black. I really don’t. I had a hispanic student last year who helped us translate a line from the film “Training Day.” It hadn’t even occurred to me to ask her. I didn’t see her as hispanic. Just as a student. This might be good; it might be bad.

The only thing I ever advised the students on was that this novel is set in the deep south during a very controversial time. That’s part of the novel’s power. I can’t blame Harper Lee for using authentic language to illustrated that aspect of the novel. You could walk into Kristie’s former place of employment and hear that word uttered 50 times before noon. That’s why this novel is still relevant and why I didn’t make a big issue of the world. If it’s a problem, we’ll deal with it then. And when we come to the word, we’ll deal with it then. But that has become a key part of the novel too - just like the themes and characters and events.

******

Here’s one to go with “I before you except after me.” Some students were discussing Sybil Vane’s fate from “The Picture of Dorian Gray.” One girl stated, “She OCD” on drugs! Ha. One of her friends explained to her that it was just “OD’ not “OCD.”

“What is that something that happens on the OC?” one of the guys quipped.

This was the same student who last year in class, after reading a story, chimed in to our class discussion with, “Now I get it. She was on heroine. No wonder I couldn’t understand the story.”

I had to explain to her that we were talking about a “heroin” as in a female hero, not the drug.

So I said, “Maybe Sybil OCD on heroine!” Those from last year got a good laugh out of that.

It is just one of those days.

****

I don’t know if this is a compliment or not - two guys said they were coming back from Fargo and saw the sign for the town “Reynolds.” Today they said, “Hey, we nearly stopped and got the town sign from Reynolds for you Mr. Reynolds.” I don’t know how administration would look upon me adorning my walls with stolen property. But it made me laugh and shake my head nonetheless.